So it’s been a while…Why has it been? Well, because I’m letting you in. I’m letting you see the lesser pretty side. I have restarted this…deleted and deleted to start again. I’m scared to share these moments with you, but I know life isn’t always as glamourous as we sometimes portray on social media. You know… The moments Facebook or Instagram pictures don’t show. I like to post the good things because that’s what memories should be made of. We can look back at pictures of smiles and laughter, and forget what was bad at that time. It helps us to see there is GOOD in every day even if every day isn’t great. I LOVE those Facebook memories when they pop up! We go through hardships and trials. People don’t always need to see the darkness. At least I don’t think so. We see plenty of that now a days. Am I right? I have a good life. Is it always pretty? Heck no, but there are beautiful moments. There are great moments, and there are plenty of God moments too. I CHOOSE to hold on to those, and I hope you do too. This blog will show the good, the bad, and the God moments. I mentioned starting in the middle, but without a glimpse of the beginning you may not truly understand where red hair party of 4 began.
It was 2005. I met Jason outside of a small town on my way to Amarillo. He was dreamy. (Of course I thought so!) I was on my way to the big city to party it up. I was 19 at the time. I was a sophomore in college and not looking to settle down. Or so I thought…
He is older than I am, and way wiser in a lot of areas! (Haha, but not all. 😉 j/k!) I had a choice of going to Texas Tech or Texas A&M. I chose Aggieland because it was/is a great school, and I loved where I was at. Whoop!(Sorry I couldn’t resist!) Jason decided to move closer so I could finish school, and see where this whole “thing” was headed. For some reason he saw something in me, and decided to stick around. I knew it was different with him. He fell before I did. In fact, he scared me away a few times because of my insecurities and self-doubt. They say you know when you’ve met the one, and that is true in my case. We dated long distance, and I tried as hard I could not to fall for him. (I had commitment issues.) I had broken up with him, and one night my mom said, “you love him don’t you?” With huge tears in my eyes, I said, “yes!” I practically begged him to take me back! After a year and a half of dating, he chose me, and he asked me to be his wife. We have been married 10 years, and my love has grown even stronger for him. I knew he was it. I was and am so happy he chose me.
I’m happy he has stuck around through the good, the bad, and the worst to see the best in me. He has lifted me up when I didn’t deserve it, and has built me up, and continues to build me up to the woman I am today. He has let me grieve/heal from the past, helped me transition into motherhood, and helped me find out who I am in Christ. He continues to build me up when I am struggling. No one is perfect. I know this. But I know God brought Jason to me because he knew exactly who I needed to help me through the trialing times.
Healing from the past is hard. Then when other things arise like fear and anxiety that’s when it hits really hard, and you feel like your life has been turned upside down. It’s not fun and it’s not pretty. This is where God intervenes, and helps where no one else can…
#redhairpartyof4 